|The Mystery within...|
Just like slow food cooking is better for you than fast food, I am coming to appreciate the same is true with the slow healing of my knee that I sprained a week ago. Each day brings a little more mobility, and lessening of pain. My slower pace allows for more keen observation and reflection. Even though I really miss being more active, especially outdoors, I have noticed I am less anxious about what isn’t getting done. I’ve also gotten some help with yard work from my daughter for which I am grateful. Some ingredients for hanging on to my calm appear to be acceptance for what is, a lowering of expectations for what needs to get done, and becoming more comfortable with needing help.
The On-Being guest Krista Tippett interviewed this past week was timely for me. He was Dr. Bessel van der Kolk – Restoring the Body: Yoga, EMDR, and Treating Trauma. He is also author of “The Body Keeps the Score.” He spoke of the importance of the social context in how trauma occurs as being very important because the body holds the memory of those sensate experiences. My initial knee injury and subsequent surgery was the result of a cross-country skiing accident during a January thaw when I went out to work off some significant frustration. My left ski caught a patch of mud and I did a 180-degree turn on that knee well over twenty-five years ago. Could my knee need a talking to about its time to forget? Or is this just a continuing learning benefit from an initial trauma? This needs further thought and investigation.
My memoir, “God Never Hurries,” is like a cookbook on slow healing from abuse and the significant challenges in caring for parents. My troubles have been my greatest teachers because they caused me to search for my truth, which I then found in everyday experiences and the natural world. I learned it’s a lot easier to stay miserable than to make changes in my life. I came to see everything as a both/and thing, got a grip on my complicity in my troubles, was infused with courage, and came to know true freedom from forgiveness. And I am now becoming aware of a growing compassion for the other that knows no bounds. There may be no end to trauma benefits. Just going deeper.
What if we saw our traumas as potentially rich training opportunities?