Tuesday, November 26, 2019

Sacred Connections


The Mystery within...
Thursday, November 21, 2019

A bumper sticker caught my eye and went straight to my heart today.  It said, "Believing in her worth she succeeded."  

Friday, November 22, 2019

My bumper sticker sighting yesterday brought back the memory of another bumper sticker that changed the direction of my life and opened me to the world of paradox and the power in reflection. It said, "Silence feeds abuse." In God Never Hurries I wrote:  

"Silence is a both/and thing. It is golden when I curb my ego and silently accept another's shortcomings in the name of kindness. It is a gift when it leads me to reflect on the messages in my life. But silence also feeds abuse, and as Anne LaMont writes in Bird by Bird, we are only as sick as our secrets. 

Believing in my own worth became the source of my courage to tell the truth. I believe my heart healed with the truth of my worthiness. 

Isn't it amazing the power that can come from reflecting on bumper stickers?

Saturday, November 23, 2019

Today my heart felt significant turmoil after reading claims of political righteousness that couldn't be further from the truth. I was so upset I could not sleep even though I was very tired. So I got out of bed and drafted a letter to the editor of my two local papers and my heart quieted. 

It still surprises me how negative events can spark positive thought and action.

Monday, November 25, 2019

Letter to the editor:


Politics and Spirituality

Politics is an inevitable journey that can destroy or transform the world. I believe we are at a critical crossroads in our human development and how we vote will determine our progress or decline as human beings. Please vote as if every person and all of the earth is sacred, because the earth and we are sacred.

Spirituality is a profound sense of belonging to one another and the earth. Spirituality is about love and love yearns to transform the world. Love doesn't vote to maximize self-interest but looks to what serves us all. The Spirit of Love expands notions of private morality and makes us more tolerant and forgiving beings. 

Be engaged with the critical issues of our time. I invite you to come to Ozaukee County Democrats' monthly meetings the third Wednesday of each month at the Saukville Village Hall from 7:00 to 8:30 p.m. We are a friendly group of perfectly imperfect people working together to improve life for all and protect our Mother Earth.

Tuesday, November 26, 2019

I am so aware of how fortunate I am to be living in a democracy, albeit a struggling one, and having others who support me in this struggle. Wherever you may live, find others to support you in your struggles because we are all deeply connected.    

Tuesday, November 19, 2019

Comforting Connections

Tuesday, November 12, 2019

The Mystery within...
As I closed the living room shades against the unseasonably cold night my memory was jogged by the near full moon’s blue glow on the early cover of snow. I remembered a nighttime winter walk with my son Joe and our then beagle-cocker mix, Lydia. I wrote of that walk in my first memoire God Never Hurries

I remembered soulful fun from another earlier time when my late son Joe and I took Lydia for a walk after a big snowstorm. We went behind the school that night where deep drifts lay against a steep hill. I can almost hear Joe’s and my laughter, feel the fresh cold air in my lungs and on my happy face, as the three of us took running jumps and dives into the blue moonlit drift. Lydia’s little black body wriggled as she got stuck in the depths. We had more fun that otters.

That memory was so clear tonight I could almost see Joe and me in the kitchen when we returned home happily refreshed by the cold air, and the fun we had in the blue moon lit snow. I believe Joe is near tonight.

Thursday, November 14, 2019

A young man named James warmed heart with deep gratitude Wednesday night. 

I was getting ready to print copies of a reading to take to my Cedarburg library writers’ group when my printer jammed. I couldn’t see how to open the printer, or get the print cartridge out, to see if that’s where I would pull the half way out paper all the way out.  So I called my local Office Max and asked if I brought my printer in could someone please help me with unjamming the paper. I was told they do not do any service work. I pleaded and said, “When I buy replacement print cartridges I bring in my printer and someone puts the cartridge in for me. All I want is for someone to show me how to open the printer to get the stuck paper out. Reluctantly, the young woman who answered the phone told me I needed to speak with James. When he came to the phone I told him of my need for help and he said, “We don’t do any service work”. I repeated the print cartridge scenario. There was silence. I asked, if I come in with my printer in the next 15 minutes would he be there and help me open it up.  More silence, and then, “Yes”.       

It was miraculous. First, because of my beseeching persistence, second, because James didn’t even have to look at the back of the machine as he opened it up and handed me the rumpled paper. I thanked him profusely and asked if I could give him something. He shook his head “no” with a disbelieving smile. I was euphoric as I walked out with my printer past the young cashier. I told her its out. She smiled and said warmly, “I’m so glad.” 

My lightheartedness stayed with me the rest of the night. Who would ever guess a paper jam could bring such happiness?

Friday, November 15, 2019

Ask and you shall receive. Seek and you shall find. Knock and it will be opened.

Saturday, November 16, 2019

Last night at a Full Moon Circle gathering of women we reflected on women’s need to ask for what we want from life. Asking for ourselves is not something most of us were raised to do but is important, not only for us, but to the benefit of all. It was suggested we begin each day asking for something for ourselves. 

I began this day asking that I live more from my heart today. Truly amazing things happened. I was more aware of how I moved through my day—with more acceptance, more thoughtful responses to others, and forgiveness of myself when I could have done better. I now want to make living more from my heart a conscious standing request to begin each day. And hopefully I’ll learn to tack on other requests too. 

Monday, November 18, 2019

When I saw today’s date on my computer screen I felt its significance. Thirty years ago today, my youngest son Joe died at age 22. The devastating emptiness of losing him slowly healed through my acceptance. Tonight I wonder what life would have been like if he were still alive. That I will never know. What I do know tonight is I fear my own eventual death less because of him.

Tuesday, November 19, 2019

The following stanza from a poem by Rashani titled, “Unbroken” appeared in an e-mail from the Center for Courage and Renewal this morning.

There is a hollow space
Too vast for words
Through which we pass with each loss,
Out of whose darkness
We are sanctioned into being.

Deep comfort comes when we connect with another’s pain and the understanding that comes from it. It is why and how I wrote Both/and Things—The Power in Reflection, God Never Hurries, and continue with writing this blog.     

Monday, November 11, 2019

Connecting


The Mystery within...

Wednesday, November 6, 2019

Really tired tonight. Medical appointments and shoveling snow claimed my energy. I am grateful for my easy access to medical care and my car that got me to my appointments and back home. Wishing all of humanity had easy access to medical care and a home to come back to.

Friday, November 8, 2019

Oliver went to the vet Thursday. Major change looms in our lives. The fluid drained from his back leg is being analyzed. No more walks for a while and maybe the end of rough housing with my son’s dog, Moxy. It was an expensive visit along with weight loss prescription dog food that was ordered. Hardest of all will be no woods walks for two weeks. It is the highlight of our day for both of us.

I never took our daily walk among the trees for granted. But now there is deep longing for our treks across the wooden bridge with the river’s movement beneath us; and the breeze or wind, or stillness among the tall maples, beech and oaks who greet us; the intoxicating freshness of air that heals us in body, mind and soul--this absence in our life now deeply grieves us.

Monday, November 11, 2019

After publishing Both/and Things—The Power in Reflection I thought returning to written reflections on the significance in each of my days would be a good and easy way to stay connected with Spirit, and you who read my posts. And it is—when I do it. When I skip a day or days because I am exhausted as I climb into bed, and doubt I would have anything worthwhile to reflect on, I feel like I am failing you, my readers and myself. I think there is something amiss in my thinking.

Whether or not I feel connected isn’t the point because we are intricately intertwined with everyone and everything in life. And everyday, no matter how mundane it may appear, holds significance for you and me and waits to be discovered in reflection. 

I remember Thursday when driving to Yoga I was listening to an NPR piece on the two men who created Netflix. What stood out for me in that discussion was how these co-founders were complete opposites in personality and how each approached life and problem solving differently. Enhanced creativity was said to be the result of accepting and working with their differences. Thursday night, after Oliver’s vet visit, I was too wrung out and tired to reflect and write about that.

And last night, after spending the entire day preparing my son Mike’s birthday dinner, I was numb tired and didn’t write, but grateful for the time and food we shared celebrating him, and the leftovers I ate tonight.

I go to sleep this night conflicted because of the appearance of ants on my kitchen counter and in the leftover blueberry pie. I put out ant poison tonight even though we are connected.  

Monday, November 4, 2019

Acceptance

The Mystery within..

Wednesday, October 30, 2019

Delia Owens’ novel Where the Crawdads Sing was discussed at book club tonight. Her story’s ending left us with a moral dilemma. I was a little surprised how quickly some came to judgment during our discussion. Life is not so black and white for me anymore. I have come to know its complexities and how differing experiences affect options and actions. I am grateful to know life is not so black and white anymore. 

Thursday, October 31, 2019

Seven inches of blowing snow piled up on this last day in October. This early snow just seemed wrong until Oliver and I walked to the woods late this afternoon. The snow had stopped and the wind moderated. The wood’s beauty was so unique with freshness and color. It could only have happen with soft October snow that stuck and contrasted on grey and black tree trunks supporting a bright yellow canopy of snow covered leaves. The wood’s beauty was humbling.

Friday, November 1, 2019

In my physically challenging physioball class this morning, I relayed an annoying experience I had on a recent visit to my clinic to get a stuffy ear checked out. A young nurse came to escort me to the exam room. She made an exaggerated point of telling me how very far down the hall I would have to walk. And when we reached the exam room she exclaimed, “Yeh! You made it!”  My exercise classmates wanted to know if I said something to her.  I said, “No, but I wanted to smack her.” And the class instructor said, “You could have said something to the doctor.”

Tonight I understand I still have a very long way to go in using my voice. I could have come up with a clever retort, or better yet, a heart centered reply of correction. Worst of all, before we made that long trek down the hall into the exam room the young nurse had introduced me to another nurse in training who was shadowing her that day. 

Life really is full of complexity and endless opportunities for learning how to use my voice.

Saturday, November 2, 2019

Tonight I am aware that it isn’t possible to think of a heart centered response when you would like to smack someone. So I needed to back up and accept the young nurse did not understand how patronizing her words and tone of voice sounded to me. I am the one who needed empathy and compassion for her lack of awarenessPerhaps then I would have found kind words and I could have said, “I know you do not intend to sound patronizing, but my age has not yet handicapped me. And if it did, I would prefer you just walk with me at my pace and not make an issue of my physical limitations.”

Any other suggestions out there on a heart centered response I could have made to the young nurse who escorted me to the exam room?

Monday, November 4, 2019

Today in yoga we were encouraged to smile from our heart. I liked that and so does my heart. It made me recall a question I put to my instructor almost two years ago when I asked for one tip on “putting up with the other”.  My instructor said, “Breathe from your heart”. Maybe if I smile from my heart more it will be easier to breathe from my heart and then I can more easily learn to speak words of kind correction instead of wanting to smack someone.