Sharing Grace

The Mystery within...

Last weeks post ended asking, “What if we could all go to our heart when the pressure is on?” since it is in the heart, not the mind or gut, where we learn to live with grace.  So this past week I have been asking myself, “What could help me get to or stay in my heart when pressed?”  The poem titled “New Year’s Resolutions” came to mind.  I put it in my blog’s Comfort Messages section and labeled it Ego Training.

New Year’s Resolutions

People are unreasonable, illogical, and self-centered.

 Love them anyway.

If you do good, people may accuse you of selfish motives. 

Do good anyway.

If you are successful, you may win false friends and true enemies. 

Succeed anyway.

The good you do today may be forgotten tomorrow.

Do good anyway.

Honesty and transparency make you vulnerable. 

Be honest and transparent anyway.

What you spend years building may be destroyed overnight. 

Build anyway. 

People who really want help may attack you if you help them.

Help them anyway. 

Give the world the best you have and you may get hurt.

Give the world your best anyway.

The world is full of conflict. 

Chose peace of mind anyway.

Author:  Anonymous

I have also been wondering if you readers have something to share on how to go to or stay in the heart when the pressure is on?

What if we all shared what helps us live with grace?

Grace Under Pressure

From my memoir “God Never Hurries:”

“I found much grace in my trouble.  Because my life was at stake, I became keenly aware of everything.  It was a time of heightened consciousness and vivid dreams.”

* * *

“There was much grace in howling.  It gave voice to my pain.  The deep inhalations and long slow exhalations were good for the body as well as the soul.  It was an instinctive response that helped me understand how the ability to flee is injured when being too nice, and how being too nice normalizes abnormal behavior.”

* * *

“Grace happened frequently on public radio broadcasts.  It was uncanny how things I struggled with would then be featured on my favorite public radio station.”

A ritual of writing about the joys and troubles in each day, and immersing myself in the natural world, tended my grief as I struggled for my mother’s safety in her Alzheimer’s disease, and with my father’s alcoholism.  I came to see God in all things and people.  Time spent in sorrow and solitude somehow nourished me.  Facing my fallibility was freeing.  My soul awakened with outrage.  Neglected and repressed parts of myself learned to speak.  Through vulnerability I came to know the comfort of others’ empathy.  Ever so slowly, God was growing me.  Having gone through all of that I have been puzzling lately how stressed out I have been over less monumental problems.  So in Yoga class this morning, when our instructor asked, “What do people want to work on today?”  I responded, “How about grace under pressure.”  I was grateful my request did not stump him.   

As we lay on our mats doing calming diaphragmatic breathing and heart-opening exercises, our wise instructor said, “One way to combat stress is to be thankful for what we have.”  And I have consciously been working on that.  But then he added, “You also have to get out of your mind and gut and be in your heart.”  Immediately I understood.  When the pressure is on I am nowhere near my heart.  He also said, whatever happens, it is important to know I will be all right.  In the community of my yoga class, with the rapt attention of all, my stress was replaced with a calming anticipation of a more open heart and continued learning.

What if we could all go to our heart when the pressure is on? 

Reviewing Trust

The Mystery within...

I learned many different things about life, and myself, as I struggled to care for my aging parents who suffered from alcoholism and Alzheimer's disease.  Perhaps the most important was to trust God as I was running out of solutions and hope to solve big problems. From God Never Hurries: “What a plan God had to test my trust—to go to the root of my perpetual responsibility condition—to let go of any savior image of myself, to let pain be pain and mystery be mystery.”  I found real courage during that time of significant difficulty.  I did my inner work through daily written reflection and came to own my complicity in my troubles.

Lately, life is again stressful for me on multiple fronts.  I’ve been working hard to find solutions--maybe too hard.  Is daily written reflection currently a part of my life?  No.  I know it would help.  Are there things I should be grateful for?  Yes.  I own a home and have homeowner’s insurance that will cover much of the needed repairs even though they have been dragging out all summer and are still not done.  I have health insurance to cover the medical tests I am currently undergoing.  And I have a pension that pays the bills.  I know there are deeper hidden gifts in my current troubles.  Daily written reflecting could unwrap them for me.  For now, I printed out Teilhard de Chardin’s “Above All Trust in the Slow Work of God” from my Comfort Messages titled Learning Trust.  

What if it was easy to find the gifts in our troubles?  Would we still learn as much? 

Shadow and Light

The Mystery within...

I watched in fascination as the Earth’s shadow gradually darkened the moon’s bright face last night. I wondered what part of earth’s geography belonged to the slow growing darkness that was eclipsing the moon’s reflected sunlight?  What landforms and people existed in that growing shadowy space?  Were famine and violence there?  Carl Jung in his wisdom said:  “Knowing your own darkness is the best method for dealing with the darkness of other people.”  And I felt the opportunity that awaits us all in the power of reflection.

I also felt a little sigh of relief that Pope Francis was now safely back home tonight.  He came and looked upon us with God’s eyes bringing Peace, Love, Joy and Compassion and an example to emulate if we wish to bring the same to others.    

What if we could all know the power of reflecting on our shadow?

A Hidden God

The Mystery within...

“Whoever does not know God hidden in suffering does not know God at All.”  Martin Luther.

“Prior to hardship a heart may be proud but honor comes only after one has been humbled.”  Proverbs 18:12

Pope Francis comes to talk to Americans.  I believe he will ask us to look with God’s eyes on those who suffer, suspend all judgment, and act with compassion. Can we be humbled?

What if we could all see God in another and our suffering?

Who Needs Trouble?

The Mystery within...

I have been wrestling with a financial scare these past few months.  It’s the kind of worry that comes with a sinking feeling in the pit of the stomach and concern for the future.  Through frugal and thoughtful living I have generally felt financially secure—a feeling I now have hope will return.  But there is grace in this current uncertainty.  It comes with a sense of deep empathy for the many who experience the insecurity of inadequate food, shelter, and access to medical care.  I am now aware of deep gratitude for my new knee, relative good health, house and car.  How easy it becomes to take these blessings for granted.  And my mental mettle is being challenged and exercised as I work to solve my problem.  I am also experiencing genuine kindness from others who offered helpful facts and advice.  Sharing their knowledge and concern makes me want to be truly helpful to another someday.  So who needs trouble?  I think we all do to some degree to grow our empathy, realize gratitude for what we have, exercise our brain in working to problem solve, and be a benefactor of genuine kindness. 

At yoga this morning, where I go the stretch and soften my stress, I half seriously asked if we could work on memory.  I was astounded at the eloquent mini lecture our wise instructor gave as we worked to both soften and strengthen our bodies.  He relayed four things we can do to help our memory:

1.  Exercise our large motor muscles—such as in bicycling.  Exercise our fine motor muscles—such as in keyboarding, or playing a musical instrument, or even computer games.  

2.  Mobilize heartfelt love and compassion. 

3.  Have concern and empathy for the other. 

4.  Do deep diaphragmatic breathing to oxygenate our tissues and brain and potentially connect us to our Energy Source.

I’ve had my share of past troubles.  Where I would be without them?

What if we all had a good mix of trouble and help to work through our problems, grow gratitude, empathy and kindness and work on our memory too?

Being Human

The Mystery within...

Sometimes it’s not pleasant being human.  My gremlin within reared its ugly head this past week and made me feel really crummy.  I was making a quick stop at the grocery store to pick up a few things and standing in the less than 20 items checkout lane.  The woman in front of me had only two items but there was a very elderly couple in front of her who had several bags of groceries, and now with pains taking slowness, the wife was handing over a handful of coupons one by one.  My demon within mumbled quietly, “What the hell.”  The woman in front of me with the two items turned and looked at me so I said, “This is a limited items checkout lane.”  To which she replied, “Oh, I didn’t even notice that.” 

Instantly I regretted my words and my impatience embarrassed me.  Less than two months ago I was in that same checkout lane with a cart full of groceries because I didn’t notice the 20 items limit.  When I offered to move to another lane two women behind me said, “No, you can stay.  We don’t mind.”  Standing there having those groceries rung up, I remembered yet another check out experience when a very elderly woman was painfully slow with her purchases and payment.  After she left the man behind me said empathically, “We’re all going to be there someday.” 

Now, adding to my embarrassment was the elderly and weary looking checker who had also overheard my mumble.  She forced pleasantness as she checked me out but I suspect she wondered if I had any empathy at all.  Hopefully my dark feelings can become a sacrament of shame and will give me pause the next time I feel impatient.   

What if we could all use personal embarrassment to tame our  gremlin within?