The Mystery within... |
I had a freak accident this past January while walking in a
wood with my son and our dogs. A six
inch rotted tree limb fell on my head, knocking me to the ground and
temporarily stunning me. Our walk ended
abruptly with a trip to the Emergency Room where I received five staples to
close the bloody gash on my head. Later,
when I told my acupuncturist what happened she said, “It looks like the universe is trying to tell
you something.” I told her, “I’m all
ears.”
It will soon be June and I am still feeling residual effects
from that bump on the head. I’m now seeing an Occupational Therapist for
cranial sacral massage to see if she can help put things back in order so when
I bend over to tie my shoes I can do it without pain in my eyes and head. We are making progress along with unexpected
discovery.
As my therapist’s caring and skillful hands worked to
realign what the tree limb had disturbed, traumatic memories from my childhood
came flooding back with surprising emotional intensity. My strong reaction recalled my reading of Dr.
Bessel A. van der Kolk’s book, “The Body Keeps the Score” and his words
regarding abuse, “The body needs to learn the danger has passed and to live in
the reality of the present.” The mystery
deepens for me on the body/mind connection and the many layers of slow healing
needed from past abuse. I also became
aware there are real steps to successful forgiveness of the other that cannot
be passed over lightly.
I reviewed some of Robert Enright’s writing on the process
of forgiveness, particularly his caution that we not forgive prematurely before
we gain real insight into how much the past injury has affected our life. Enright states, “A fundamental step in coming
to offer forgiveness to an offender is clarifying the nature of the offense and
how it has compromised one’s life.” I
guess my body has recently reminded me of that.
Coming in contact with those strong emotions still hiding in
my body was a real surprise. I am grateful for their revelation along with the
knowledge that healing from abuse is slow work, and the fundamental steps to
real forgiveness cannot be passed over lightly.
It also left me knowing how open and non-judgmental I need to be toward
others on their own healing journeys and forgiveness.
What if the universe could be gentler in telling us what we
need to know? Would we still learn?
Marcia, what an awesome blessing. Don't get me wrong it was a terrible freak accident but the teaching you came away with was mind blowing to me. I like how you started out responding you were all ears when your acupuncturist mentioned that the universe was trying to tell you something. Then you received the message, the buried memories. How you processed those memories is inspirational to me. I really liked you quote on forgiveness. Really, this is important stuff, for you, for me, for anyone who needs it. Thank you, Janice
ReplyDeleteJanice, Thanks for your encouraging words. I'm grateful to know we made a helpful connection through this reflection. There is so much we can learn from sharing and receiving one another's thoughts. I appreciate your sharing with me. Marcia
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