Monday, May 20, 2013

The Paradox of Fear

God is...

I have just started reading Gavin De Becker’s book “The Gift of Fear.”  His first chapter begins quoting the author Margaret Atwood, “This above all, to refuse to be a victim.”  Her words resonated deep within me.  Then De Becker surprised me with a definition of intuition that succinctly summarized what led me to write God Never Hurries.  He wrote,  “Intuition connects us to the natural world and to our nature.”  And, “Nature’s greatest accomplishment, the human brain, is never more efficient or invested than when its host is at risk.  Then intuition is catapulted to another level entirely, a height at which it can accurately be called graceful, even miraculous.”  When I struggled with my aging parents’ care needs, I believe Attwood’s words were an unspoken mantra permeating my being, and De Becker accurately sourced them coming from the natural world.  Together their words highlight the grace nature provided, and my humble attempt to share it through my memoir.

My writing was sparked one early morning when instead of driving the two hours to get to my parent’s house in time to make breakfast, I uncharacteristically took a walk to Lake Michigan with my beach buddy, Bear (shepherd/husky).  As we walked my heart, mind, body and soul were consumed in what the day might hold.  But I was most aware of my soul.  It seemed to be telling me, “Love is courage talking, not long-suffering silence.  Down in the valley it looked as if my glasses were smudged.  But When I took them off I realized it was a soft mist beginning to enshroud me.  The farther down we walked, the heavier and more comforting the veil became.  Then turning a bend in the deepest part of the valley, the sun came alive as it beamed through the trees.  I caught my breath and heard my voice say softly, “Oh my God.”  (She is so beautiful in person.)  And I was infused with courage.  It was as if the sweet seductive voice of God whispered, “Be not afraid.”  Fear led me on that walk where I was told to not be afraid.  It was the beginning of my resolve to trust in the slow work of God.

What if intuition does connect us to the natural world and our true nature?  What if the piece of God within us, our original blessing, flows from the natural world?  What would we each of us do differently?

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